8 Tips om je kind aan vriendjes te helpen

22
Herken je dat? Je staat op het schoolplein en er wordt onderhandeld “wie bij wie gaat”. Met een beetje geluk is jouw kind onderdeel van deze ruilhandel, maar met een beetje pech is het dat niet en keer je elke dag alleen met je schat huiswaarts. Hoe help jij je kind met het maken van vriendjes?

Kleine kinderen hebben niet zo’n behoefte aan andere kinderen. Zet twee baby’s naast elkaar en grote kans dat ze elkaar niet aankijken en het allebei toch leuk hebben. Dat verandert op de basisschool. Meisjes ontdekken andere meisjes, krijgen vriendinnen en de jongens ontdekken andere jongens om mee te ravotten. Vriendschapen worden gesloten. Zelfs vriendschappen voor het leven.
Maar soms ook niet. Je hebt een leuk kind, dat vind je tenminste zelf, maar het klikt gewoon niet met de kinderen uit de klas. Dan mag mama best een beetje helpen!

1. Doe je kind op een clubje. Misschien zitten daar wél gelijkgestemde kids.

2. Kijk eens objectief naar je eigen kind. Hoe leuk hij of zij ook is, misschien herken je een van deze dingen: je kind maakt veel ruzie, is hij nooit vrolijk, heeft geen zelfvertrouwen, wordt gepest, vindt veel eng, huilt veel, is heel snel boos. Ja? Praat daar dan eens over met de juf en – als je durft- met andere moeders, die je vertrouwt. En kijk eens naar jezelf. Geef jij het goede voorbeeld? Zorg ervoor dat je je kind genoeg positieve aandacht geeft. In het leven van een kind is zelfvertrouwen het toverwoord.

3. Als je kind gedrag vertoont dat vrienden maken in de weg staat, kun je proberen dat een beetje bij te sturen. Kinderen zijn net grote mensen, bepaald gedrag zit nou eenmaal in de genen. Maar je kunt je kind dan wel helpen daar beter mee om te gaan. Veroordeel het gedrag niet, maar probeer het te begrijpen en dan andere oplossingen aan te dragen. Dus niet: ”Stop nou eens met janken”, maar: “Ik zie dat je het eng vindt, wat vindt je eng?”.

4. Je kunt pas goede relaties aangaan als je je gevoelens weet te beheersen. Kinderen moeten dat nog leren. Voor een deel is dat een kwestie van karakter, voor een deel kun je er invloed op hebben. Het blijkt dat kinderen zichzelf beter leren beheersen als ouders begripvol reageren op hun emoties en gevoelens. Zeg dus bij iets kleins niet: ‘Je stelt je aan’, maar: ‘Ik zie dat je het vervelend vindt’.

5. Sommige kinderen zijn niet zo handig in een gesprek. Uit onzekerheid willen ze steeds opnoemen wat ze goed doen en zich in alle gesprekken mengen. Kortom: altijd het laatste woord hebben. Dat is niet handig in vriendschappen. Leer ze om te luisteren naar anderen. Dat kun je gewoon oefenen. Vriendschap is een wisselwerking.

6. Misschien vergeet je kind op andere kinderen te letten. Even een arm om een ander kind heen als die is gevallen, iets aardigs zeggen als iemand iets goeds heeft gedaan. Geef zelf het goede voorbeeld. Jij en je man zijn de grootste rolmodellen voor je kind.

7. Als je kind heel erg gefixeerd raakt op het maken van vriendjes, helpt het om uit te leggen dat hij of zij wat losser kan zijn.

8. Investeer in de vriendschappen van je kinderen. Ze mogen mee naar huis om te spelen, mee-eten mag ook. Hoe lastig ook in te passen, als er nooit tijd is om bij jou thuis te spelen haken andere ouders ook snel af om die van jou altijd mee te nemen. Als jij zorgt dat het gezellig is bij jou en je het spelen een beetje kan regisseren, komen andere kinderen sneller met jouw kind mee. En doe wat actiefs met ze, zodat de focus niet zo op je kind ligt. Iets bakken, in de speeltuin spelen, tekenen of schilderen….

Bron: opvoeden.nl

Share.

About Author

22 reacties

  1. I truly wanted to send a brief note in order to express gratitude to you for those awesome hints you are placing at this website. My prolonged internet investigation has at the end of the day been compensated with reasonable facts and techniques to exchange with my guests. I ‘d claim that many of us website visitors are quite blessed to exist in a notable network with very many wonderful professionals with insightful concepts. I feel very much lucky to have discovered your entire website and look forward to tons of more thrilling moments reading here. Thank you once again for all the details.

  2. I would like to get across my affection for your kindness supporting folks who must have assistance with this concept. Your personal commitment to passing the solution up and down ended up being pretty beneficial and have all the time made professionals much like me to arrive at their objectives. Your personal interesting facts denotes this much a person like me and additionally to my peers. Warm regards; from each one of us.

  3. Thanks for your whole effort on this site. Gloria takes pleasure in getting into investigation and it’s really simple to grasp why. My spouse and i hear all of the dynamic medium you produce rewarding information on the web blog and therefore attract participation from some other people on this issue then our favorite simple princess is truly becoming educated so much. Enjoy the rest of the year. You’re the one carrying out a pretty cool job.

  4. I must show some appreciation to the writer for bailing me out of such a predicament. Right after surfing throughout the online world and meeting thoughts that were not powerful, I believed my entire life was over. Living devoid of the strategies to the difficulties you’ve sorted out by means of the blog post is a critical case, and ones which could have in a wrong way damaged my entire career if I hadn’t encountered your web site. Your primary ability and kindness in touching all the stuff was precious. I’m not sure what I would’ve done if I had not come upon such a thing like this. I am able to now look forward to my future. Thank you very much for the skilled and effective guide. I will not hesitate to suggest the website to any individual who would need recommendations about this matter.

  5. I in addition to my buddies came checking the good things on your web site and so immediately I got an awful suspicion I never thanked the web site owner for those tips. Most of the women appeared to be consequently stimulated to see them and have now in actuality been enjoying those things. Appreciate your truly being well accommodating as well as for going for variety of brilliant subjects most people are really wanting to learn about. My sincere apologies for not expressing appreciation to you earlier.

  6. A lot of thanks for all your valuable efforts on this blog. Gloria takes pleasure in carrying out investigations and it is easy to see why. A number of us know all about the lively tactic you make efficient items by means of the website and cause participation from other individuals on the article then our own simple princess is always learning a great deal. Enjoy the rest of the year. You are always carrying out a useful job.

  7. I simply needed to say thanks once again. I’m not certain the things that I would have handled in the absence of the entire methods provided by you about such concern. It had become an absolute scary scenario for me personally, however , spending time with the well-written mode you solved the issue forced me to jump over delight. I’m grateful for your guidance and then have high hopes you realize what a great job you have been doing training people thru a site. I am sure you’ve never encountered any of us.

  8. Thank you a lot for providing individuals with an exceptionally memorable opportunity to read in detail from this blog. It is always very enjoyable plus jam-packed with a good time for me personally and my office friends to visit the blog not less than thrice weekly to study the latest things you will have. And of course, I am certainly happy for the dazzling inspiring ideas you give. Selected 1 facts in this posting are in fact the most impressive I’ve had.

  9. I simply wanted to compose a simple note to be able to thank you for these pleasant hints you are sharing on this website. My particularly long internet research has at the end of the day been compensated with beneficial facts and strategies to exchange with my two friends. I would believe that many of us website visitors are extremely endowed to be in a very good community with very many marvellous people with very beneficial strategies. I feel quite grateful to have encountered your web pages and look forward to really more brilliant moments reading here. Thanks a lot once again for everything.

  10. I discovered your weblog site on google and examine a number of of your early posts. Continue to maintain up the superb operate. I just extra up your RSS feed to my MSN News Reader. Seeking forward to reading extra from you later on!?

  11. I’m just writing to let you know what a magnificent discovery our daughter went through going through your blog. She figured out so many details, with the inclusion of what it’s like to possess an incredible helping heart to make the others effortlessly learn about a variety of extremely tough issues. You actually exceeded my expected results. I appreciate you for giving such essential, dependable, explanatory and as well as easy tips about this topic to Evelyn.

  12. Thanks so much for providing individuals with a very remarkable possiblity to read articles and blog posts from this web site. It is usually so sweet and also stuffed with a lot of fun for me personally and my office colleagues to visit your blog no less than 3 times a week to read the latest guides you will have. And indeed, we are usually impressed considering the attractive concepts you give. Certain 4 ideas in this article are ultimately the simplest I’ve ever had.

  13. Thanks for all your efforts on this website. Kim delights in engaging in investigation and it’s simple to grasp why. I notice all relating to the compelling way you make powerful thoughts on your website and as well welcome participation from some others on that issue while our simple princess is always understanding a great deal. Take pleasure in the rest of the year. You are carrying out a really great job.

  14. I actually wanted to construct a quick note so as to thank you for all of the great tips and tricks you are posting on this website. My considerable internet research has at the end of the day been paid with incredibly good suggestions to talk about with my colleagues. I ‘d suppose that many of us site visitors actually are rather blessed to dwell in a magnificent site with so many special professionals with helpful tricks. I feel pretty fortunate to have discovered the web pages and look forward to plenty of more pleasurable times reading here. Thanks again for all the details.

  15. I wanted to send you the very small note to be able to say thanks as before over the stunning solutions you’ve shown in this article. This has been really wonderfully generous of you to grant publicly just what many people could have offered for an e-book to get some dough on their own, specifically considering the fact that you might well have tried it in the event you considered necessary. The tactics likewise served to be the great way to be certain that the rest have a similar interest the same as my own to figure out much more on the topic of this condition. I know there are many more pleasurable moments up front for those who browse through your blog post.

  16. I would like to show my passion for your kindness supporting visitors who really want guidance on this one niche. Your very own dedication to getting the message throughout appears to be certainly valuable and has allowed most people much like me to realize their ambitions. Your helpful suggestions denotes a great deal a person like me and somewhat more to my peers. Many thanks; from each one of us.

  17. I intended to write you that very little remark to help thank you the moment again about the awesome knowledge you’ve discussed at this time. This has been really surprisingly generous with you to make unhampered just what a number of us would have marketed for an e-book to earn some money for their own end, mostly seeing that you could possibly have tried it in case you desired. These tips additionally acted like the good way to be certain that the rest have the identical dreams similar to my very own to figure out whole lot more with reference to this matter. I’m sure there are a lot more pleasant occasions in the future for many who find out your blog.

  18. I have to express my respect for your generosity in support of men and women that have the need for guidance on this particular area. Your very own dedication to getting the solution throughout has been really insightful and have specifically encouraged associates just like me to realize their targets. Your entire warm and helpful help and advice implies this much to me and a whole lot more to my peers. Regards; from each one of us.

  19. I must point out my affection for your kind-heartedness supporting people who really need assistance with this important field. Your very own dedication to getting the solution all over turned out to be unbelievably practical and has without exception empowered regular people much like me to reach their ambitions. Your new informative tutorial can mean much to me and further more to my fellow workers. Thanks a ton; from everyone of us.

Leave A Reply